There are some stories in life that are so personal, so heartbreakingly beautiful, and so humbling that they are hard to share. It is hard to find the right words to describe how intimately the Father knows us.
Is one of those stories.
My first week in Uganda I had the privilege of meeting and holding and tickling and kissing a little baby named Jacob. For some unknown reason I felt an instant connection with him. He was all smiles and giggles and had the most trusting eyes. The very next week. This precious child of God died. It shattered me. I blogged about it here. How dare the Father let this little one die with out a family, a mother, without anyone who would mourn for him. So I decided I would. I did not know him well, but I missed him. From that point forward any child at the orphanage I met that felt the slightest bit feverish I marched them to the nurse and demanded medicine. When I left Uganda I thought Jacob and his story would just stay there and it would be something I would think about often. But nothing more.
Fast forward to around November of 2010. One evening I was browsing Uganda adoption blogs [a favorite past time!] and I stumbled across Lovelyn's blog. I read her story of how her family brought baby Clayton home and I realized that I knew her son! He was at Sanyu when I was and I had pictures of him!!! I excitedly emailed her an
d attached the pictures. I could not believe it! I remember her son being so adorable and so full of life and laughter--just like Jacob. Her heart for orphans is inspiring and contagious and makes me want to reach for more in life. As I was reading her story of bringing Clayton home I read about how during this process she had to tell a woman that the child she was trying to bring home, Lucas, had died before she had the chance to go back and get him. Can you imagine. What is worse is that her son died in October and she did not find out until January. So I clicked on her blog.
and I froze.
All along the top of her blog were pictures. Pictures of Jacob. Jacob had a mother. Her name was Anna. I now know that the trust and life I saw in his eyes was because he had already known love. A mothers love. I was not the only one grieving for this child. His mother was and is grieving for him. I sat in my bed and sobbed.
How. Out of the thousands of blogs out there how did I come across this one?
Only the Father could have orchestrated this one.
So I emailed her.