My eyes are heavy and I know that I should be sleeping. I have work in the morning and a long day ahead. But my mind and my heart are full.....
I have spent the last few minutes reading back over some of my blog posts from Uganda....oh how I miss that country. The people, the babies, the conversations, the simplicity of it all. While I enjoy the comforts of America immensely-- the distractions and materialism are exhausting. I am currently working full time at a doctor's office at the front desk, and let me tell you. That is a mission field in and of itself. I love interacting with the patients and attempting to show them the love and kindness of Christ in the minute or so that I spend with them.
Life has been interesting for me over the past few months. I am getting ready to move to my 8th location in the past year. Change and I are starting to become REALLY good friends. :o) You would think this would help me learn to trust the Lord more...but honestly....for a few months I feel like I lost my way. I have had a hard time carving out this new niche for myself here in Raleigh. It was more that just me that changed when I went to Uganda. Now that I am back I am realizing that most of my relationships with my friends have changed too. I have been looking for a more permnant place to live since I returned from Uganda. A wonderful family from my church has GRACIOUSLY let me stay with them for the past 3 months. Have I mentioned how much I love my church here in Raleigh, Vintage21. This family has shown me more love and grace and generosity than I know what to do with. I have loved being able to see them show Christ to eachother and to me. All of that said...I still do not have a "permanant" place to live! I know that the Lord already knows who I am going to live with and where I am going to live....I must surrender it daily to Him. He is continually reminding me how much I need Him. That He is the ONLY way to make it through the day and that HE is the ONLY constant I need. That even if I move 20 times in one year....it won't matter because He will be with me every step of the way!
I am living in this intake of breath. In that moment right before you turn the corner and see a beautiful sight. I have seen the glimmer of joy and hope in His eyes and He is about to lead me somewhere amazingly unexpected. The Spirit is whispering to hold on, more change is coming, but cling to me. He will lead me. He will make straight the paths that crooked lie, Lord before these feet of mine.